Are you not… ENTERTAINED?

So NBC is undergoing a gut check, and it’ll be interesting to see if they discover an existence proof. Brian Williams’s imaginary traumas in the desert have come home to roost on his head like loose-boweled pigeons, and the network is in a bit of a tizzy. What to do? Dozens of millions of dollars are … [more]

Cool story, bro

Image stolen from a Pinterest poseur boy. Well, sure, it got pretty intense that time, but I wasn’t scared. With Brian Williams at the controls of our chopper, what could possibly go wrong? Showing complete disregard for his personal safety, Reporter’s Mate First Class Williams hovered the bird over our enemies in the face of withering fire. … [more]

Knock this chip off my pedestal

Enough about the sniper guy, already. If you believe that Chris Kyle was a hero without flaws, you’ve gone woozy from the intoxicating smell of his jock. He was, at the least, an occasional liar and notable braggart. Not that I begrudge him his well-earned braggadocio (per the Oakland Raiders of yore, “it ain’t braggin’ if … [more]

A toast you don’t hear much anymore

It goes something like this: Here’s to cops. The beat cops: uniforms, flatfoots, the rookies and the vets. The men in blue – and the women – who get called everything your mother told you not to say, back when you were a kid and remembered what it was like to respect other people. The … [more]

Old Ideas

This is an unconventional re-run, not a piece I wrote a while back and recently disinterred, but a speech prepared hastily (was there any other way?) nearly 25 years ago by a callow undergraduate looking for answers. Half a lifetime later, I’m a little embarrassed to put it up here — the confident righteousness of … [more]

ROK ‘n’ roll

Once upon a time back in the misty past of the early 1980s, a geeky 19-y.o. pushed BCGs up his nose, hoisted a green duffel over his green polyester leisure suit with its one lonely ribbon, and got onto Flight 007 to head for the Republic of Korea via Japan. We didn’t yet know how … [more]

A terse reminder

Dear fellow American, I’d like to pass along this brief reminder, for purposes of clarification. Despite what others may say, you’re not part of the problem if you: believe your President heralds the coming of the Antichrist call your military servicemembers “sadists” and “mass murderers” insist on social control of vaginas, but are afraid to … [more]

Pick It Up

You, I got a problem with.

You’re the guy who believes the One Percent are more important than the 99 Percent, not because you think they’re terrific people but because you just insist on having a relentless, secret antagonist to justify your failures by their oppressions. You’re the political lesbian who wants more to blame men than to love women. You’re the people who run around waving your hooves, bleating “Sheeple! Sheeple!” at everyone else, instead of actually DOING anything about the problems you vaguely perceive but are unwilling to define, let alone work to remedy.