SHITBIRD

Your United States military is a many-splendored institution built on centuries of bright honor and revered tradition. If it’s also got its skeletons and missteps, you may want to kindly squint past that. Serving under arms is a harder path than most Americans want to walk and if you’re not one of them, then sit … [more]

A Eulogy in Doggerel

WP Engine The Ketamine Kowboy KorpsIs cutting and slashing some moreThey’re ready to treatYour job as a cheatIf they don’t understand your chores You must send them a small, earnest missiveAn excuse for your being employedThese kids can’t understandUnless YOU lend a handNo accountants among these smart boys! They’re just hackers and rocketry internsKids who … [more]

Place of Refuge

“Spread out, ya knuckleheads!” Our drill sergeant barked at us in his normally cheerful tone. “One grenade’d get all y’all!” Murmuring alarm at the inevitable bloody future awaiting us, we shut up and spread out, thus facilitating getting dropped to the red, South Carolina dirt for a smoke session. The lesson held: crowding together equals … [more]

Get A Life

It’s a general article of faith in today’s GOP (and pretty much nowhere else in America) that women seeking abortions are slutty, adulterous murder bitches.

Card Carrying

What is the measure of a man?

Last Dance

Dear Mr. President: Tough week, huh? I feel ya. You’ve been a helluva President, and now folks are telling you to just… let it go. There is no one more experienced with our government machinations than you. Your staff is impeccable, and they’re keeping you on track. What is it with all these lily-livered Democrats, … [more]

Borrowed Valor

It’s a joke and a cliché and the truest thing you’ll ever hear from us: “You weren’t there, man.”

Normalcy is an Ugly Word

“Normalcy” is that elusive quality that Pres. Reagan promised us a return to. If you’re old enough, and reasonably literate, you may recall how the term was decried by contemporary writers and pundits as a squishily semi-literate, hacked-up stand-in for the perfectly adequate (not to mention dictionarily correct) apropism, “normality.” No doubt Pres. Warren G. … [more]